drama

today i skip my geografi tuition and went to komtar for yt drama perform...
that is so nice and u wont felt regret after u finished it...
that is so touching and so real...
u can felt their hardworking and anything from their show...
the first time i felt like that and i cry for a movie only...
but also cause that is so nice just can make me cry...
after that when i went home...
my mum like know that i skip my tuition lesson already...
and it is so scary...
but unluckily...
i kena pukul also...
cause i skip the tuition so i rather...
but i dint cry at all...
although that is so pain and i know...
lol.
now still pain but i think it will be better after some day...
lol.

1.16a.m

i miss you right now!!!
i love you right now!!!
i want you right now!!!
i need you right now!!!

miss him again ler...

today...i heard the song...then my tears lost control d....i think back the time we had together...but i dint go cherish...even dont care also...the time we play together even u still act cool...the campfirenight we hug together even u look like want cry but duwan let the tears come down...the time we sit down for a rest for many days of tired...the time we work harder for the bamboo and anything...the time we eat together or even we cook together...all our memories...now i just know that it is so special and even money or anything also cant but it...i miss you right now...if need i sleep just can get u, then i rather to sleep forever...the first guy in my life...really is the first life...let my life change at all...cant forget so easily...why??? did u miss me in this two years also??? this two years all my brain also think at u...thank you...for accompany me for a moment when i need you before...thanks and i love you...

speechless!!!

我们曾经说好的幸福永远 一直藏在书包的拉链
多麽希望回到那年 我们写的诗篇
好想听你说说爱我 好像听你说说想我
这些年你有没有 曾经想起过我
好像对你说说爱你 好像对你说说想你
这些年你知不知 我常想念着你 想念着你
这些年你知不知 脑袋里装的全都是你 全都是你
诉说着我的感受 心里话 全说出口
听你说说多爱我 听你说说想我
谢谢你曾经陪着我 说着我们幸福 的经过

suey a!!!

today i am not going school...ah!! nono...i am going school...but teacher not yet start the first period...i already go back home from school...cause vamid and felt so unwell...haihs..sick again d..."visit" the doctor again...in this month...i "visit" the doctor already four times ler...wtf.. what happen to me??? i dont know also...just keep sick and not hand get hurt tiok is leg get hurt...suey a!!! i hate it...damm hard d...the whole month also like so many thing happen d...haihs.

break up

one of my friend was break up with her boy last day...i feel so shocked when i heard it...and i feel so sad for her but anyway i also will cheer her up...this thing suddenly let me think that if got 1 day that is me...what will i do...cry again??? nope...i promise i wont...i wont tell anyone also...i will just act emo and keep quite...just let the thing pass away quitely...so that my friend wont know and they wont worry and they wont ask...cause i know if they trying to comfort me or asking for what the reason or what happen...i make sure and i 100% comfirm that i will cry out...so my friends, if got 1 day u see me act emo...please dont ask me for what happen...

hard but i want!!!

have sometimes will think that maybe still got a little bit chance...but maybe will be o% also...i dont know what can i do anymore...feel so hard...but i want to give up...in my heart...i know that we are impossible although we now are friend and more good than...but so what...still want wait or what... continue or stop it??? who can teach me...what i must do??? what he thinking??? and what i want??? i really still like him anot??? or that is just a kebiasaan...haihs...comfused a...i want find back the feel that we talk before...can i??? may i?? did i??? nope!!! i cant do it...it just will make me cant give up more and hard more...everytime when u talk to me...i feel so scare...why??? maybe it just scare u will say anything that i duwan hear...i promise myself that no matter what happen and i wont cry anymore...n i believe i can do it...i duwan be too weak already...even i cry...also wont in front anyones...even my family or my friend also nope...just now think back when traplex campfirenight 2009...unbelievelable u will come and talk to me...and we are stay at there for a moment and that time we are so close and so touching heart...i want it again...and i hope it wont be late...i feel so regret why that time i just keep quite no matter what u say to me...if give me another chance...i wont just keep quite...i want tell u what am i thinking this few years...everyone said that i like you...izit that truth??? i wont like you anymore...but so sorry...i know that i just can do it at this moment only...that time when u smile to me and when u talk to me...the memories and image wont be forget inside my brain even inside my heart also...i want you to know...i wont said that i love you...but i just can say that if got 1 day i know that u got girlfriend le, my heart will feel so pain...

traplex reunion

traplex reunion is coming soon on march19th...
just left i with sabrina and kuang ling are going only...
mei hoong them still duwan go and even zhi hui, peier, shea ling, ree won, wei wei them also dont want go...
just because of the missunderstand...
sweat...
it not be nothing already???
they say dont want go is because they feel that they go there will feel so bored and will like no ones will go care them...
why???
doens't the traplex reunion before...
kuang ling say must wear formal wear want...
haha.
that means need wear dress...
and my high heals...
haha...
omg.
wear high heals will too high anot???
haha...
sabrina say that day maybe calvin is going...
haihs...
if nicholas chor is going that good la...
but anyway..
the traplex reunion will be so fantastis and i believe it...

feel so tired for loving you..

suddenly i feel so tired for loving you and i am starting to give up already...
i know we are imposible...
but...i also still feel that still got a little bit's hope between us...
i want become more wonderful so that u will like me also...
i know cause a people and change myself is a stupid action...
but what can i do...
the moment of silent when i am sad....
i just scare i will let someone know that i am sad now...
because i dont want disturb anyone who beside me...
give up???
is that so easy...
i try hard to treat myself better...
but u always act like dont know or maybe dont want know also...
i admit...
that i will think back when i am alone and starting to cry...
cause i dont know what can i do anymore...
i will start for loving you cause i believe the next girl will be more good and wonderful than me...
the girl will become an angle and help love you until forever...

for him...

i like dint tell you before i like you...
i dint say it out also...
maybe just a feeling or maybe just playing...
how know and who know...
i still cant give up...
still think that it will be nothing after 1 month or more...
but now i just realise that i cant and it is so hard...
everyday thinking about it...
go school... everyone ask me about this...
izit i already give up just i dont know only??
who can teach me???
how to give up a people that u like for so long time...
can other people replace your place at my heart...
i think nope...
why???
it is bitter or it is sweet when u remember my face???
i hope it not the taste of salty tear...
i only can leave you far away yet you still unluckily hurt me...
but i am the farer from you the closer you are in my eyes...
let us meet at 30th february if there really have a day in this world...

for all my pfs family...

sorry about that...really sorry...i miss u all guys so much...i want know how u all now??? how your hair??? it is good??? how your school??? and how your life??? i long time dint see u all already...did u all change already???i believe wont and cannot!!!
haha...ahbo i will hate u all if u all forget me this lanshii and khong gan d people...=) i want hear what u all calling me again...can i?? because of this name...let everyone know me already...also want thanks sheng for the "nicely" name...
i hope that our friendship wont be change...although we less to meet...can u all promise it???everytime i think back when we at trasplex09...it is so special...a lot of memories at there...unforgetable...honestly..thanks u all...from LANSHII...

this is what sheng wrote for us...

I dont know how am I going to start , but I admit , we all never talk to you all after camp. We're not like Dickson , Jian Ming , or Daniel. They are different from us , Me , Enzio , Jojo , You Gene. You said we play you all? Think back , just think. Enzio everyday comes to meeting , for what? He have transport , family problem. But he still come. Same as I , I'm originally from Unit 3 , both me and jojo. But we choose to come to unit 4 , because it's better , because you all make us smile MORE than them. Even when i got into trouble , that day. Did i blame you all? Did i? I still come for the meetings , seriously. We all missed you all too. How i perli wei wei , ka chg ka chg , how i follow her run. How we suan zhi hui and ong , how we suan her zhi bai bai. And laugh at mei hoong every single time , and never forget to mention , pei er. taaaam chiak. and also sabrina , minyi. all of you , i'm here just to express what our feelings. Me , enzio , you gene and jojo. We never regret having CDK in traplex 2009 , its something new , something diff. I would just like to apologize to all of you , the names i dont have to mention. First , i thought i dont have to explain anything to you all at all , because you all doesnt try to understand us , but to judge us , zhi hui's blog about me selfish , hurts me the most. I decided not to explain. But enzio told me , we need to explain in order not to end this relationship.When me and enzio was writing this , we try not to cry , try not to shed any tears. But you guys meant so much to us. Give us so many memories. Its like a tattoo in our heart anymore , unforgetable.Honestly , thanks. you all are like , A new friends we never had before , different from others , a worth while friend. But maybe you guys are right , timing is not right. Me and enzio , we're different from dickson and jian ming. Very different. So dont compare us to them. I dont know what to say anymore , thats all from enzio , you gene , and jojo. The next words , are from me , ur so called tu gao daddy. Did you all realise everytime you all called me that , i cant resist but to smile? Zhi hui , when you ask me , i want to da jia anot , all i do was to smile and said , wo bu yaooo wo bu yaoooooo. Right? I miss that time too , thank you , CDK GUIDES. thanks , maybe our relationship wont be so close as before , because you all has your own life style , i have my own lifestyle. Thats it , the end of whats inside my heart. To shiea ling , what i can say is just a sorry. You failed to understand me , and thought of me as a bad guy. it doesnt matter anymore , its for your own good. I dont wanna hurt you any longer , because i know things will be like this after camp. Thanks for everything. Love , from your tu kao daddy.

hurts and missunderstand..

i miss sheng them so much...
really...
i miss the lanshii and khong gan that they perli me...
although i at sch also always got heard it from zhihui or meihoong them...
my i just realise that it is different...
not the feeling and tone...
i miss it...
but now...
they have some missunderstand between sheng them and zhi hui them...
it will become our stone between our friendship...
i admit that we not closer like before...
but it doenst means anything what...
not closer not means not friend anymore what...
but this is what am i thinking laa...
i dnt know what are them thinking...
but i just hope that it will same like last time what we do and we had at traplex2009...
it is so different...
zhihui, did u realise that this year traplex is so different than last year...
cause we had sheng them...
when they perli us maybe we will geram or beh syok...
but did u realise...
after that we will hope that it will again again and wont be lost...
sheng, i with sabrina got try to help u all explain to zhihui them...
but we dont know how to told them...
so sorry...
everytime i heard that any song about us such as chu, lachata, ring ding dong, with you, lollipop, two is better than one...
my tears will cannot control...
then finally i cry...
that why we are cherish u all so much and care so much...
i miss the traplex09...
of course...
i miss you all so much too...

thinking of you.

i still find each day too short for all the thoughts i want to think, all the walks i want to take, all the books i want to read and all of you i want to think.
thinking of you makes my life complete. You're my golden clouds; you're my smile. You are all the soulful love songs within my spirit, like an angel calling me... perfect for my soul!
if I were given a dollar for every time you were in my thoughts, I'd only have one because you never left them.
if today, a smile should appear on your face, it's because at this very minute, I am thinking of you and I am smiling too.
Every time you look at me and see me smiling, just know that I am thinking of you!
So, here I am, all by myself, thinking of you - no one else. There's a feeling inside and as hard as I try, it just won't go away.
I am thinking of you, In my sleepless solitude tonight. If it's wrong to love you, then my heart just won't let me be right. 'Cause I'm drowned in you, And I won't pull through, without you by my side.
When we're together or when we're apart, you're first in my thoughts and first in my heart.
I lie on my bed and stare at the ceiling. My thoughts - all about you, gives me a lovely feeling!
Thinking of u is easy - I do it every day. Missing u is the heartache, that never goes away.

i love you.

love is life.
love will keep you young and forever.
you fall in love and experience the love.
saying i love you is always special.
when you love someone, all your saved-up wishes start coming out.
everyone admits that love is wonderful and necessary, yet no one agrees or just what it is.
i love you not for what you are, but for what i am when i am with you.
love is too strong a word that say it out too early, but it has a too beautiful meaning to say it too late.
for you see, each day i love you more.
today more than yesterday and less than tomorrow.
love is not only something you feel, its something you do.

updated!!!

long time dint updated my blog already
sorry yea
cause my finger and hand get hurt already
damm pain so cant type
this few day got a lot of thing happen by my side
all my friends also get ready to face the relationship problem
finally, the all relationship was end in a new year
lols.
maybe not our wrong also not their wrong
but, what means love.
love is means that love each other with a true heart and "rela"
so dint have people wrong
just can say that u all are bo ngam to each other
maybe really is different world
maybe
this few day i very miss him
go school all my friends also will perli me
i guess i miss you everyday although i am sleeping
i dream u last night
the dream is so true but when i wake up i just remember that everything is so imposible
haihs.
if that is truth.
i promised that i really will cherish it very much.